Would it hurt me?
Yes it would but I'm used to it.
You know, I still love you and all I want is for you to have things to go your way.
You still want to save this relationship. I wasn't expecting that answer.
I'm still not convinced that this is what you want.
There are three things that I would like to tell you.
First, I miss you.
Second, I need you.
Third, I love you.

I don't wish to save something that's sinking. It's impossible.

I'm running out of time now and I still haven't made my decision yet.
As much as I want this, I don't want to have to sacrifice anything.
Ibu said let go. Faiz said, he's behind me all the way. Yani said may Allah guide me.
My sis said, think about it kakak. El said, think about it.
I'm thinking. I realize I am not strong and my faith is still weak. There's alot to think about. I have to think about what others may think of me. About myself and about the people who's taking me in.
Ibu said there's alot more opportunities for me in the future. But the problem is, I don't want to quit and then look back and said, 'What if?'. I told Ibu just now that I want to continue and give it a shot. And she asked me, 'And by continuing, does this mean you have to give it up?'. This made me think twice. What shall I do?
I don't want to make a decision based on what others tell me to do. I want it to be MY decision. Not theirs. I just hope that when I make my decision, everyone will stand by me. There's alot of things that's running through my mind and I just can't explain it. If I were to go tomorrow, I hope they'll think twice and let me wear them. I don't feel nice now.
Anyhoos, I am going cycling later on with the three 'S's. I just realized all of their names starts with and 'S'. -.-
I can't wait to see Yani fall. HAHAHAHAHA!!

"Rambut itu makhota seorang wanita."

I'm in a dilemma.
When I make a decision, I bear the consequences and that's just scary.

Somebody pull my heart out, please?

Come on Zi, this is just a test. 
You've seen this coming. You've been through this.
You know you're strong.
The problem is, I hate being tricked again. 

You know, in life, you're bound to meet people who are gonna sweep you off your feet and they will throw you back down hard. That hurts but it teaches you something new everytime you're thrown back down. I've got alot of things that I have on my mind that I wish I could say out but I don't think I'm in any position to say anything. Everybody dreams big dreams. I'm guilty of that too. But no, I do not wish to be anyone else but me. I love my weird, crazy friends. I still love my estranged boyfriend. I do not intend to blend into the crowd at times. I love my weird habits. I love my quiet time alone.Only He understands me best.
The thing is, I'm constantly thinking. And my thoughts can be quite lethal sometimes.
Damn.